


Support

by maddogkyouchan



Series: trantsukki [3]
Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Coming Out, F/M, Fluff, M/M, Nonbinary Character, Trans Female Character, Trans Male Character
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-18
Updated: 2020-04-18
Packaged: 2021-03-01 20:29:10
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,833
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23723113
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/maddogkyouchan/pseuds/maddogkyouchan
Summary: Tsukishima thinks she's finally ready.
Relationships: Azumane Asahi/Sawamura Daichi/Sugawara Koushi, Hinata Shouyou/Kageyama Tobio, Kinoshita Hisashi/Narita Kazuhito, Nishinoya Yuu/Yamaguchi Tadashi, Takeda Ittetsu/Ukai Keishin, Tanaka Ryuunosuke/Tsukishima Kei
Series: trantsukki [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1701427
Comments: 24
Kudos: 137





	Support

Tsukishima takes a seat on the bench carefully, not wanting her skirt to get bunched up under her. She’s still adjusting to wearing them, after all, and usually when she goes out it’s only a midnight trip to the store and back- no sitting involved.

This is distinctly different, though, because she’s waiting for someone. That, and she has on new shoes, so it’s better to not stand around for however long it takes for that person to show up. Heels aren’t the easiest to walk in, but she likes the extra height it gives her, and the shine in Tanaka’s eyes when he sees her in them. Today, though, they aren’t for him.

And her evening guest finally arrives- though, of course, they’re right on time, and Tsukishima is the one who came too early. “Tsukishima!” Suga greets her with a smile. She stands to meet them, and they whistle. “Heels? I already have to crane my head up to look at you!”

“I’m sure an extra inch or two isn’t too much for your neck, Sugawara-san.” She’s relieved they dressed up like they promised- while their high-waisted shorts and cropped sweater aren’t as distinctly feminine as Tsukishima’s dress and heels, it’s still enough to take some attention away from Tsukishima’s outfit if they were to be seen like this by someone they know.

“Well, I guess it’s worth it. You look nice, Hotaru-san!”

“Thank you. You do, too,” she returns the compliment awkwardly. This isn’t exactly her forte, after all. The only person she’s open around is her… whatever Tanaka is to her, and she doesn’t have to be nice to him. Suga, however, is someone she actually respects, and someone who’s offering her help. If she can ask for it, anyway.

“So, you wanted to talk?” they prompt.

She doesn’t, is the thing. She’d rather keep everything under wraps for the rest of high school. Change quickly for gym and sports (and pretend that on her worst days she doesn’t hate every centimeter of her body), bite back bile when her family calls her Kei (because what else could they call her, it’s not their fault), and disappear when she graduates, change herself so completely that her own brother wouldn’t recognize her when he passed her in the street.

But on the other hand.

Tanaka spent the summer with her- with Hotaru. He called her by the name she thought she’d only hear when people mispronounce the kanji making it up, the name she’s forced to ‘correct’ when they do. But he said it, dozens of times, and knew he was right when he said it.

And that’s nothing compared to everything else. How he treated her the same he would any other girl, never used the wrong pronouns or honorifics, told her she was cute and that he liked her-

Of course, Tsukishima wouldn’t want that last part from everyone. But everything he said and did over the summer opened up a new path for her. One she’s unsure if she should take. One where she tells people. Where she lets people know her, and in return they treat her in a way that doesn’t make her skin crawl.

It’s not easy, she knows it couldn’t be. It’ll get her hurt, something she’s always been so careful to avoid, putting a lid over her problems and pretending they aren’t there. But she snapped the first time she realized she couldn’t just ignore the fact that she was a girl. She accepted it, and was happier for it, in the end, even with its ups and downs. This would be another sacrifice, another bout of taking hurt in exchange for comfort, but it could be worth it, she thinks.

“I want to come out to the team,” she tells Suga, voice even despite how unsure she feels.

At the least, Suga seems pleased. “Oh! That’s great! I’ve been thinking about doing the same- we could do it together!”

“…you make it sound so easy, Sugawara-san,” she sighs. “Like it’s something we could get over with no problem.”

“It could be,” they tell her. “I mean, I already know Asahi and Daichi are fine with me, and they’d be fine with you, too. You already have Tanaka- oh, and by the way, I was wondering what was going-”

“Nothing.” She adjusts her glasses. At Suga’s expectant look, she continues. “Yet.”

“Yet, huh? So you’re going to give in to him eventually?”

“Back on topic,” she deflects. “Coming out.”

Suga waves their hand dismissingly. “I already know most of the team will be fine with it. The rest, well… we might have to explain it to Kageyama, and maybe some of the others too, but I don’t imagine it could go that badly, you know?”

Tsukishima crosses her arms, nail tapping against her arm. “Or it could be a disaster,” she says flatly. “We could be ostracized from the team. And while this is your last year, I have two and a half to go with these people, who could out me-”

“Whoa, whoa-” Suga rests a hand on Tsukishima’s arm. “No one would out you. They all know better than that by now. Daichi gave a lecture last year- well, let’s just say you have nothing to fear from the second years. And I can’t imagine any of the first years would, either.”

…she can easily imagine it. But Suga is a much better judge of character than she is. “Alright. Then…”

“Let’s do it, Hotaru-san,” Suga insists. “Over the next week. Ah, let’s sit down and plan it.”

And so they do, sitting on the bench and discussing the best way to come out to the team. They both agree, Tsukishima should start with Daichi and Asahi, practically riskless, and then work through the second years one by one. Then, with all of them behind them, they can come out to the other first years in a group. It’s a solid plan, one that Suga sells Tsukishima on pretty well, to the point where she can actually believe in it.

Of course, that’s not how it actually goes.

Tsukishima tells Tanaka about it that night over the phone, lying in bed after soundproofing the room by shoving blankets in the gap under the door. Her mother is sure she has a secret girlfriend, spurred on further by her not confirming or denying it. Her secret phone calls and late-night excursions hint at it heavily, but she’s not ready to explain it- how there’s someone in her life that makes her feel good like this, or more specifically, there’s someone who makes her feel like herself, without limitations. She thinks her mother might have a good idea, anyway, even if not the specifics.

Tanaka bursts into cheers when she tells him she’s coming out, enough that she has to hold the phone away from her ear while he works through his excitement. Of course, his first question is if he can call her Hotaru-chan in front of the team, quickly followed by his second question on whether he can use the g-word, which spills into how everyone will be so jealous, that he’s so lucky-

She hangs up, and it’s not until far too late that she realizes that she never told him no.

The morning is perfectly normal. Yamaguchi meets her at her house. They walk to school in no rush, Yamaguchi taking over the conversation as he’s been doing more and more recently, her just adding the occasional comment. They head to the gym for morning practice, just a little late.

Then, they open the doors, and Tanaka’s voice fills the room. “There she is!”

Tsukishima freezes in the door as Tanaka hurries to her side, wrapping an arm around her waist. “An official introduction to my girlfriend, Hotaru-chan!”

Immediately, she knows what’s gone wrong, and she sighs, closing her eyes and cursing her past self for hanging up before telling him the plan. “Tanaka. This isn’t exactly how I planned to come out to the team,” she says, trying to gain even a shred of control over the situation. Yamaguchi starts making choking noises from behind her.

“Huh?! Tsukishima is a girl?” Hinata is the first to speak up, and she opens her eyes to glare at him.

“Yes. I’m transgender,” she says, already psyching herself up to have to explain it to him, but he cuts her off immediately.

“Oh! Oh! Oh, Tsukishima- I’m a boy!”

“…yes. I know that,” she says slowly.

“No, I mean- like that! I’m trans and a boy!”

Her first thought is that that’s bullshit, and he must be misunderstanding something, and then she thinks back to how he changes in private and talks about how he used to be on a girls’ team (or something along those lines) and- “How the hell did I not know that?” she says, mostly to herself.

Hinata shrugs, beaming. “I guess you’re not as smart as you think you are, Tsukishima!”

“Wait,” Kageyama inserts himself into the conversation, expression intense as always. “If you’re a girl now, you’re not going to leave the team, are you?”

“What, and have to get used to a new team of idiots? I’d rather just quit,” she answers quickly, and tries to shove down how she wants to be here. That’s a problem for another day.

“But you’re not going to quit,” Kageyama half-asks, half-orders.

Tsukishima just rolls her eyes. “I should have known that this is what would matter to you. And here I thought I’d have to spend half an hour explaining to you what being trans is, but no, you just want to know how it affects the team-”

“Hah? Why would you have to explain it? My boyfriend’s trans.”

The room’s quiet as most of the team turns to look between him and Hinata.

“…aaaAAAAAAAA KAGEYAMA YOU DUMBASS-” Hinata jumps on him.

“What?! WHAT?!”

While they fight it out, Yamaguchi grabs Tsukishima’s arm to get her attention. “Tsukki! Why- why didn’t you tell me? Did I seem like I wouldn’t be supportive? Do I give that kind of vibe?”

She glances to make sure no one’s paying attention to them- other than Tanaka, still holding her close- before answering. “No. I just didn’t know… I wasn’t ready, I guess. I wasn’t ready today, especially-”

“Sorry, Hotaru-chan, I thought it was okay!” Tanaka tightens his grip a little.

“Maybe you should have waited for a clear yes instead of assuming it was fine. I don’t recall agreeing to being your girlfriend, anyway,” she says, mostly teasing.

He shoots a grin up at her, one that almost makes her smile in response. “But you’re not saying you’re not, right?”

“I mean…”

“Say no!” Noya calls out, apparently having listened in on them. “Ryu can’t date someone before I do!”

She switches tracks. “Of course I’m your girlfriend, Ryuunosuke.”

It’s a one-hit kill. He goes weak in the knees, clinging to her to stay standing. Noya just groans louder. “Tsukishima, you suck! Ugh, I want a boyfriend too, how come all the first years are getting them before-”

“You like guys, Nishinoya-san?” Yamaguchi asks.

“Oh- yeah! I’m super bi. I like girls better, but boys are great too!”

“I am, too- er, I’m bi, I don’t think I have a preference like that…” Tsukishima gives Yamaguchi a hard look- one that says ‘what kind of hypocrite is upset she didn’t come out to him when he didn’t come out to her’- and he frowns. “Sorry, Tsukki! I mean, I only found out recently, if that helps…?” It does, so she lets it pass.

“How’d you find out?” Noya asks him. “Had to be Asahi-san, right? I think he was half the team’s awakening-”

“Don’t say that,” Asahi cuts him off, looking sheepish. “It’s not true.”

“Oh, come on! Me, Suga-san, Daichi-san, Hisashi-”

Kinoshita cuts him off. “Hey! Kazuhito was my first crush on a guy!”

Narita smiles at him warmly. “You were my second, after Asahi.” Kinoshita huffs a little and leans in to kiss him. Tsukishima… is surprised, but not especially so. They always did seem close.

Noya’s unsurprised, too, and continues his train of thought. “Chikara, you too, right?”

Ennoshita glances up from his phone. “Hm? No, mine was Sugawara-san. No offense, Asahi-san, I just tend to like pretty men over handsome ones.”

“What a great lead in!” Suga smiles. “Tsukishima and Hinata aren’t the only trans people on the team. I’m actually nonbinary- not a man or a woman.”

“I tend to like pretty people over handsome ones,” Ennoshita corrects himself.

“You can do that?” Kageyama asks, and ah- there’s the ignorance Tsukishima was expecting. “I thought you had to be one or the other.”

“Nope!” they answer genuinely, none of the mockery that Tsukishima was about to put into her own response if Suga hadn’t gotten there first. “People can be boys, or girls, or both or neither or change how they feel every day.”

“Huh.” Kageyama looks at Hinata. “I don’t want to be either. Do you still want to date me?”

Hinata loops his elbow through Kageyama’s, apparently having already forgotten their fight less than a minute ago. “Duh! Why would you even ask that, Bakageyama?”

“I dunno, you asked me when you told me you were trans!”

It quickly devolves into bickering again, and Tsukishima is almost happy for them. At least they won’t be inflicting their terrible personalities on anyone but each other.

“Anyone else have something to say?” Noya asks the room loudly. “Anyone else wanna reveal that they’re trans or dating or-?”

“Um!” Asahi starts, and Noya looks at him wide-eyed.

“No. No way, Asahi-san.”

“Well- it’s okay, right?” he asks Daichi, who nods at him. “I’m… Daichi and Suga and I…”

Noya throws himself on the floor, and Suga gives him a… semi-gentle kick. “We’re dating,” they finish. “Ever since Asahi came back to the team.”

“All three of you?” Yamaguchi asks, shocked. “Like you’re all… dating each other?”

“I didn’t know you three were polyamorous,” Ennoshita murmurs. “Well, if the conversation is going that way, I’m seeing a few people from other teams.”

“Whaaat?!” Noya wails, propping himself up to look at Ennoshita. “Chikara! I thought you were my brother in singlehood!”

“I think I’m as far from that as I can get.” He returns to his phone, and Noya launches himself at him, trying to steal it.

“Who are you texting? Who have you betrayed me with?!”

Tanaka has finally gotten ahold of himself after she confirm they were dating, though he’s still leaning on her heavily. “Went better than you thought, right?”

“Mmm… it could have been worse,” she answers, watching Ennoshita and Noya wrestle.

“Oh, come on, this was a great way to come out and you know it, Hotaru-chan. You’re even smiling.” She honestly hadn’t realized she was, but she quickly realizes it’s true. She glances at Tanaka just in time to see him try to peck her cheek, and she raises a hand to stop him. He ends up kissing her palm instead. “Aw, hey-”

“No kissing in front of the team,” she cuts him off.

“…so I can kiss you when we’re alone?”

“You are my boyfriend, aren’t you? I think that gives you permission in itself.”

He lets out a pleased groan. “Hotaru-chan, you’re too cute, it’s killing me.”

“Yamaguchi!” Noya calls out from where he’s abandoned his quest to steal Ennoshita’s phone. He leaves Ennoshita curled up on the floor and bounces over to a suddenly scared Yamaguchi. “You’re single, right? I’m not the only one on the team who isn’t dating someone, right?”

Yamaguchi’s face heats up. “No- I mean, yes, I’m not dating anyone.”

“Thank god!” He wraps his arms around him. “You’re totally my favorite now!”

“Hey!” Tanaka complains.

“Shut up, Mr. I-Have-a- Girlfriend! You’ll get best friend privileges back when I’m dating someone, too!” From Yamaguchi’s flustered expression, Tsukishima gets the idea that Tanaka might get those privileges back sooner than later, and she can’t help but smirk at her suffering best friend.

“Hey, what’s going on?” Coach Ukai asks from the doorway, Takeda close behind him. Tsukishima and Tanaka are still blocking the door, so she pulls him aside to let them in.

“You’re not gonna believe it!” Noya complains, still not letting go of Yamaguchi. “Tsukishima’s a girl, Suga-san’s nonbinary, most of the team is bi or gay, and everyone’s dating someone except me and Yamaguchi! You got anything to spill, too?”

Almost immediately, a look passes between the coach and their advisor, and Ukai’s face flushes. “Let’s just get practice started-”

The hooting starts up as people realize what that look meant, and Tsukishima can’t help but laugh. This really is… such an important place, she thinks. Full of annoying but good people, who she… cares about, maybe. Who she’s happy to see happy, in her own way.

Alright. Maybe with these people, it’s more than just a club to her.

**Author's Note:**

> shoutout to silkyinabottle for support and advice, and to inkheights for inspiring another (and probably the last) part of this series  
> find me on twitter at deltonysus and on tumblr at trantsukki


End file.
